Friday, August 15, 2014
It's For Real Now: What Lies Ahead?
Saturday, August 9, 2014
One Week To Go
It's down to one week before we leave for Malaysia on this grand adventure that I never expected before that unbelievable contest win in May. I am down to six days to make whatever final preparations are needed, and the reality of it all is hitting hard.
I think the semifinal speech is ready. It has changed some since May 3rd, based on feedback from my many club visits. But I have fiercely defended the part of it that is me. I vowed I would take this on as myself, whatever the risk. This one will come from my heart.
The finalist speech is what it is. I have written it, practiced it, adjusted it... and am still making more little changes. I'm not persuaded it will ever see the light of day. But I hope to complete work sometime before midweek.
And then there is the voyage. We are almost packed, and our checklist has been filled in. We are ready to enjoy the sights a bit before the convention opens, and I hope to get my mind, body and spirit in shape after the beating of an unbelievable flight.
I feel the warmth and encouragement from so many people. I hope I am worthy of that support.
It's time to count the hours.
I think the semifinal speech is ready. It has changed some since May 3rd, based on feedback from my many club visits. But I have fiercely defended the part of it that is me. I vowed I would take this on as myself, whatever the risk. This one will come from my heart.
The finalist speech is what it is. I have written it, practiced it, adjusted it... and am still making more little changes. I'm not persuaded it will ever see the light of day. But I hope to complete work sometime before midweek.
And then there is the voyage. We are almost packed, and our checklist has been filled in. We are ready to enjoy the sights a bit before the convention opens, and I hope to get my mind, body and spirit in shape after the beating of an unbelievable flight.
I feel the warmth and encouragement from so many people. I hope I am worthy of that support.
It's time to count the hours.
Sunday, August 3, 2014
The Last Home Stand
Yesterday marked my last contest speech appearance before a live audience. The local advanced club Top Triangle Toastmasters rolled out their second annual "Summer Speech Spectacular" and I was asked to present at the post-lunch slot. A few observations:
* The speech went really well. That makes three runs in a row that boosted my morale and that I hope will carry me to Malaysia. Toastmasters people almost always are the best at providing an encouraging and uplifting environment.
* I was in a deep funk Saturday. But the Speech event and the fellowship with Toastmasters did wonders for my spirits and energy. I am more in love with this organization than ever!
* I grabbed the bull by the horns. The best advice given in Toastmasters is to take the stage as often as possible. I didn't let early morning and a depressed mood stop my taking two evaluation slots where I could practice the craft of evaluations. It was a thrill to do that for very good speakers.
I look forward to doing this event again in 2015! and more like it!
* The speech went really well. That makes three runs in a row that boosted my morale and that I hope will carry me to Malaysia. Toastmasters people almost always are the best at providing an encouraging and uplifting environment.
* I was in a deep funk Saturday. But the Speech event and the fellowship with Toastmasters did wonders for my spirits and energy. I am more in love with this organization than ever!
* I grabbed the bull by the horns. The best advice given in Toastmasters is to take the stage as often as possible. I didn't let early morning and a depressed mood stop my taking two evaluation slots where I could practice the craft of evaluations. It was a thrill to do that for very good speakers.
I look forward to doing this event again in 2015! and more like it!
Thursday, July 31, 2014
Finalist Speech High Anxiety
This week I have intensively focused on the finalist speech, and I swear that it is killing me.
A run through with my coach on Monday night gave me the sense that some more practice would do the trick: to create the right flow.
A run through with my club on Wednesday gave me the sense that the speech might well have insurmountable structure, wording, emotional and flow problems. One viewer suggested I scrap it altogether---and start over.
And tonight I planned to take the finalist speech to an advanced club for some evaluation. Right now I am petrified that the club will view me as an imposter--that the same fellow who is their district champion can't come up with two good speeches. And that I am clearly not working nearly hard enough on this competition.
The truth is somewhere in between. "Through Different Eyes" was probably not as good as a I thought Monday. It does need some adjustment. But enough people have said it is not a dog that there must be hope it can make the grade.
And am I working hard enough? All my instincts tell me that one can reach a point where he is overprepared and exhausted. I am sure I am somewhere between "working hard" and "working too much".
The clock is ticking. Loudly. In a mere sixteen days I board an aircraft for whatever awaits me. And here I am, worried that I am just not ready. So. I do what I can do. Make my two presentations tonight and Saturday. Drill as often as I can. Make logical adjustments. But get rest.
A lot of anxiety. I hope I can gain clarity soon.
A run through with my coach on Monday night gave me the sense that some more practice would do the trick: to create the right flow.
A run through with my club on Wednesday gave me the sense that the speech might well have insurmountable structure, wording, emotional and flow problems. One viewer suggested I scrap it altogether---and start over.
And tonight I planned to take the finalist speech to an advanced club for some evaluation. Right now I am petrified that the club will view me as an imposter--that the same fellow who is their district champion can't come up with two good speeches. And that I am clearly not working nearly hard enough on this competition.
The truth is somewhere in between. "Through Different Eyes" was probably not as good as a I thought Monday. It does need some adjustment. But enough people have said it is not a dog that there must be hope it can make the grade.
And am I working hard enough? All my instincts tell me that one can reach a point where he is overprepared and exhausted. I am sure I am somewhere between "working hard" and "working too much".
The clock is ticking. Loudly. In a mere sixteen days I board an aircraft for whatever awaits me. And here I am, worried that I am just not ready. So. I do what I can do. Make my two presentations tonight and Saturday. Drill as often as I can. Make logical adjustments. But get rest.
A lot of anxiety. I hope I can gain clarity soon.
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
A Major Milestone of Mood
Certainly the stage was larger! I had benefit of a fine 30' x 20' stage in our city's recently refurbished 1940s movie house. I found it helpful to reacquaint myself with the dimensions of international staging after so many weeks of club meetings in odd or small spaces.
And the stakes were larger. The run-throughs last night were with my coach, a 16-year motivational speaker and semiofficial (for me!) psychiatrist. But I also had another in my "audience" who, surprisingly, had never heard me speak in this fashion. I really felt that I needed to bring my best "game".
We ran through the semifinal speech and reached the decision that I have adjusted it enough. The ending got attention and we're ready to call it a day there. That speech gets one more run through for the attendees at Durham's "Speech Spectacular" on this coming Saturday.
We also ran through the finalist speech, which I described as "rough". The judges' verdict? Good, just needs work on the ending. Unfortunately none of us had enough working brain cells at that hour to improve, so I had homework. And it's hurry-up homework! I have to present the speech twice this week.
But most of all, the big story was validation. My coach was selected in large part because she understands the balance between improvement and encouragement. I got some serious feedback, and in cases, tough love. But I felt like a champion. Or at least more of one!
Next stop: vetting the finalist speech twice more this week. We shall see what happens to that enhanced mood.
Friday, July 25, 2014
The Roller Coaster Ride of Club Evaluations and its Aftermath
A great deal has happened in my voyage to the semifinals during the past two weeks, and my head is spinning.
For one, I took vacation time in hopes of recharging my batteries. I intentionally set aside not just my professional life but also my Toastmasters life. The "meat grinder" of club presentations and evaluations had taken its toll and I needed perspective.
As is so often the case, that really didn't work. The day after my return I returned to the circuit and it was not an energizing night. The members of that club dished out a massive load of criticisms unaccompanied by anything I considered positive reinforcement. The message I took away was "change everything, including the title." And the primary evaluator made more than clear that the speech was perhaps good enough for a "local contest" but not the international stage.
I returned home entirely demoralized. I even contemplated closing down polishing work on the finalist speech. Didn't seem that would be a good use of time. And I dreaded the club presentation the next evening.
To my own surprise I didn't let that discouraged attitude color my presentation that Tuesday night. Toastmasters has taught the lessons needed to get back on the saddle and deliver a speech with passion. To my astonishment the club loved the speech and even asked me to do some Q&A after their meeting which lasted quite some time.
Same material. Different reaction. Go figure.
But that evening had only settled in my mind that I had solved the emotional questions, the takeaway, and the "connect-the-dots" issues I had wrestled with over the previous weeks. It did not change my mindset on the semifinal. I would be lying if I said that I am highly optimistic. Of the 92 people competing on August 20th, 27 will earn a trophy of some kind. I do not expect to be one of them. The corpus of feedback I have so far received has left the strong impression that I have not developed the skills needed by a contestant in the World Championship of Public Speaking. I am proud I did so well to date, and winning a district crown in a mere 24 months as a Toastmaster is a heck of an accomplishment. Now is the time for a sober assessment and a reality check. It's midnight, Cinderella.
At this point I will fly to Kuala Lumpur, give my very best, enjoy the astonishing voyage I have been on since my club contest on March 19th, and then watch and learn from the best. And perhaps again next year try the thing again.
For one, I took vacation time in hopes of recharging my batteries. I intentionally set aside not just my professional life but also my Toastmasters life. The "meat grinder" of club presentations and evaluations had taken its toll and I needed perspective.
As is so often the case, that really didn't work. The day after my return I returned to the circuit and it was not an energizing night. The members of that club dished out a massive load of criticisms unaccompanied by anything I considered positive reinforcement. The message I took away was "change everything, including the title." And the primary evaluator made more than clear that the speech was perhaps good enough for a "local contest" but not the international stage.
I returned home entirely demoralized. I even contemplated closing down polishing work on the finalist speech. Didn't seem that would be a good use of time. And I dreaded the club presentation the next evening.
To my own surprise I didn't let that discouraged attitude color my presentation that Tuesday night. Toastmasters has taught the lessons needed to get back on the saddle and deliver a speech with passion. To my astonishment the club loved the speech and even asked me to do some Q&A after their meeting which lasted quite some time.
Same material. Different reaction. Go figure.
But that evening had only settled in my mind that I had solved the emotional questions, the takeaway, and the "connect-the-dots" issues I had wrestled with over the previous weeks. It did not change my mindset on the semifinal. I would be lying if I said that I am highly optimistic. Of the 92 people competing on August 20th, 27 will earn a trophy of some kind. I do not expect to be one of them. The corpus of feedback I have so far received has left the strong impression that I have not developed the skills needed by a contestant in the World Championship of Public Speaking. I am proud I did so well to date, and winning a district crown in a mere 24 months as a Toastmaster is a heck of an accomplishment. Now is the time for a sober assessment and a reality check. It's midnight, Cinderella.
At this point I will fly to Kuala Lumpur, give my very best, enjoy the astonishing voyage I have been on since my club contest on March 19th, and then watch and learn from the best. And perhaps again next year try the thing again.
Friday, July 11, 2014
About Time to Work the Finalist Speech
Last night I visited another club for the purpose of gathering feedback on my semifinal speech. Afterwards, I did some thinking about where I am on the mission to Malaysia.
My sense is that I am just about finished with reviewing the feedback on the semifinal speech. With all due respect to last night's club, the feedback I am now getting is predominantly redundant or unhelpful. Telling me to "use the stage" is not a helpful message. Suggested additions (given that I am at an ideal 7:00) are no longer helpful. Comments on vocal variety are no longer helpful. I am listening intently to issues of emotional context, gestures, and so forth, but at each presentation they're decreasingly impactful.
For that speech, I am moving on to work with my coach for polishing. My sense is that I am now only at the stage of making adjustments, not amendments. Will the speech show up again? Absolutely---at a Speech Spectacular. But it is time for another change.
I am also supposed to prepare a second speech. And this one has not been battle tested. With the six weeks I have left, this one needs some club presentations and thorough evaluation. It's a speech I have not come to terms with. Starting July 21st, I will take this one to show.
It's a judgment call, but I think it the right call.
My sense is that I am just about finished with reviewing the feedback on the semifinal speech. With all due respect to last night's club, the feedback I am now getting is predominantly redundant or unhelpful. Telling me to "use the stage" is not a helpful message. Suggested additions (given that I am at an ideal 7:00) are no longer helpful. Comments on vocal variety are no longer helpful. I am listening intently to issues of emotional context, gestures, and so forth, but at each presentation they're decreasingly impactful.
For that speech, I am moving on to work with my coach for polishing. My sense is that I am now only at the stage of making adjustments, not amendments. Will the speech show up again? Absolutely---at a Speech Spectacular. But it is time for another change.
I am also supposed to prepare a second speech. And this one has not been battle tested. With the six weeks I have left, this one needs some club presentations and thorough evaluation. It's a speech I have not come to terms with. Starting July 21st, I will take this one to show.
It's a judgment call, but I think it the right call.
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